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Tuesday, 29 October 2013

222 - What A Pussy!!!

I am The Mighty Val
Now listen you young buck, and before I start, we may have to share the same concrete at the moment, but don't point ya dish at me, you pussy!!!!
Yeah sure I am a bit tired, and I need a little bit of TLC, but I still go like the clappers, don't stop real good though. But geeeeeeeeeeeeeeezus when you have had 36 years up with the best of them, had the back seat rock'n and roll'n in me younger days, cruised around half the Oz block with a brick up me clanger, blasted off all the young punks in their hotted up vee dubs, and cruised the main streets of no where land posing for all the chicks. Mate I am a legend. A chic magnet to boot. A real Mopar Muscle car. 265 cubic inches of grunt. 4.3 liters of big block. A classic not plastic, so go and take all your computer crapp, and point ya dish somewhere else.
I'm Mean and Lean
A'h get a life old boy. I am much, much, much, much younger than you. What 36 years in car age, mate that has got to be an eon, and is so yesterday! Wot's this about inches and litres. Get over it! Keep up with the times. Kilowatts and Nueton Metres of Torque. That's real language you Douch Head. No back seat for the chickies for me, I have a full tray and a comfortable mattres. Iv'e got a bull bar, and a fancy camera on my bum. Bet you haven't got that, you old chunk of rust and dust.
Yep, not going to point my dish at you, cause I am going back to Yamba. Hope you get shot off to north Queensland, you has been! And who is the pussy now!
Stay tooooooooooned

Thursday, 24 October 2013

221 - Here There and Everywhere

Hi there Boys and Girls, I bet you were wandering if the dreaded bug got me. Naaaaaaaaaaa pretty good these days, all is good. Back to my fighting weight, surviving on a diet of lettuce leaves, pumpkin seeds, and one glass of red at night. Feeeeeeeeeeeerk what have I done to deserve this!!! 

However moving right along, haven't posted much lately, as we (the bride and I) have been doing very little. The bride was cooking up a storm at Meals On Wheels, and me just pounding the grains of sand on sunny Sawtell beach daily, checking out the finer details of the female form.........I'm a boy that's my job.

We did catch up with our great mates Alan and Helen Satchel when they visited us. We have been mates with these two for thirty odd years, so it is always good to catch up.
Fine specimens

However apart from that , we were becoming very comfortable, tucked away in our little beach side bungalow, watching the world go by. One gets lulled into a life with the white picket fence, beach side living, close to the pub.........geeeezus suburbia was starting to look real good.

Our little beach side bungalow

But alas, just can't sit on my fat arse forever and get fatter, and watching the bank account in free fall. Tried working for the pensions department, even though the hours are fantastic, but the pay is up the shit!

Our backyard
What a body
But we are the Retro Roamers!!!!!!  We cannot be boring and sterile. We are not allowed to complain about our aches and pains. We must not check out our well worn dentures, count the never ending wrinkles, and dwell on how many times I dribble on the toilet seat in the twenty goes of aiming straight every night.

We must unite, and raise our glasses (spectacle type) and look at adventure, fun, frivolity, and debauchery. After all we are Ageing Delinquents, time is ticking away, and of course no good being the richest person in the cemetery.

We did however sneak the long week end at Glenreagh.

The place was packed, very natural (he he!!!)
 For goodness sake, a board room decision was made, the next step of our adventures, has thrust us into the wilds of the thriving metropolis of Casino New South Wales, a whole two hours up the road from our last stop. What for!!!!!!!!!! Well we are doing some very casual consultancy work for a developer / investor, which will take us through to end January 2014.

A new hairdo for the bride to journey to Casino

So I guess, our postings will be a bit sparse, but stay tooooooooned you never know what the Retro Roamers come up with next.